virus: A Statement of Being

Reed Konsler (
Wed, 19 Feb 1997 12:35:58 -0500

Why doesn't anybody ever claim to be me, huh? I feel left out.

Actually, no. The following is a statement of being, which is an attempt
to establish identity. In a list with as complicated a context a this one
we have a probelm with identity...everybody claiming to be everyone else,
motivations in question...

Consider this the e-mail equivalent of standing with palms open. If you
aren't interested in me then please skip this. I wont be offended...after
all it's a big world.

My name is Reed Garrett Konsler. I was born in 1972 is Indianaopolis
Indiana to Gary and Gloria Konsler...who are (and this is not hyperbole)
the most understanding supportive and caring parents whom I have ever had
contact with or heard off.

After moving around a lot as a child my family settled in Grosse Pointe, of the most afluent and morally isolated communities in
America. I attended a private Catholic school grades 1 to 3 and then my
parents switched me to public schools.

In 5th grade I voluenteered to be in "Gifted" math so that I could sit next
to Stacy Williams, who had volunteered before me. She was new, and blond,
and every 10-11 year old boy wanted we understood it at the time.
Alas the love was unrequited...but I did get to sit next to her for a
year...which was pretty cool. My 5th grade teacher never graded the
"gifted" math classes assignments, or else she would have realize I sucked
at math. Until that momemt I was completly average. I had shown no talent
except the ability to watch vast amounts of TV.

In 6th grade I was tracked into "Talented and Gifted" programs becuase I
had been in 5th grade "Gifted" math. I didn't do any of my homework in 6th
grade...I was spending too much time in those programs. Oh yes, and in
role-playing games...for a time I created a Dungeon and Dragons frenzy in
my school. We were all Gods...on paper at least. To the extent it is
possible, I failed 6th grade...but my parents threatened to sue the school
if the grades weren't adjusted. In the interm, a failure,
bewhildered...more or less friendless (who FAILS 6th grade?) I was
subjected to a battery of psychological and intelligance testing.

At 11 years old this is what they told me: "You are a borderline genius."
Now my response is "Borderline? Well, Fuck you!" but at the time I was
elated. I was intelligent, I had promise...the guy with the test said so.
I don't guess I know what to think about all that anymore. Do those tests
mean anything? Well...and this colors my opinion of intelligence testing
in did at the time. They told me I was a genius
(borderline...borderline?) and since then I've pretty much been a
dork...but I've been a pretty damn successful one. That stupid,
meaningless affirmation (and my parents) kept me afloat and kept me

It was somewhere around 6th grade that I was born. Somebody suggested I
might be able to think for myself and I jumped at the chance. That is my

Some details:

1) I am not a memeber of and church, including CoV.
2) I haven't read Richard's book, and I remain sckeptical (in the
friendliest sort of way).
3) I am interested in the exchange of ideas, but I am on no one elses
side. This statement of identity is mean to make this explicit.


Reed Konsler