virus: Clever Comebacks for Flame Wars

Joe E. Dees (joedees@bellsouth.net)
Tue, 1 Jun 1999 14:37:37 -0500

> 1. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique
> point of view.
>
> 2. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
>
> 3. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard
> to pronounce.
>
> 4. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
>
> 5. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't care.
>
> 6. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
>
> 7. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
>
> 8. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
>
> 9. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
>
> 10. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
>
> 11. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
>
> 12. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
>
> 13. No, my powers can only be used for good.
>
> 14. How about never? Is never good for you?
>
> 15. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn
> to worship me.
>
> 16. You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
>
> 17. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
>
> 18. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
>
> 19. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
>
> 20. Who me? I just wander from room to room.
>
> 21. My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
>
> 22. It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level
> I'm really quite busy.
>
> 23. At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
>
> 24. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
>
> 25. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself
> in public.
>
> 26. Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously
> and change the subject
>
>
>
>
>