Re: virus: [Fwd: [Fwd: [Fwd: All good things]]]

sodom (Sodom@ma.ultranet.com)
Mon, 19 Oct 1998 14:59:42 -0400


I think this is speaking of my deranged sense of humor, and my insane desire to
twist every little cheerful, bear hug, feel good story into something I like
and appreciate, Sensless violence, meaningless sex and a good dose of
unnecessary foul language. Funny - all the things the "right" is trying to get
off of television and out of movies, are the reasons i watch televisions and go
to movies.

Let's face it, my moral structure and balance have always had an aversion to
"feel good" stories like that. i dont know if it goes back to my dad telling me
"That's girl stuff - yuk" or my utter lack of respect for almost all the feel
gooders I have ever known. Perhaps it is the total lack of any philosophical
strengths of the people I have met who are "inspired" by such messages. At an
rate, I get a real suspicious and sometimes violent emotional responses to
stories like that. I always feel much better after twisting them around to
represent a more realistic or probable or nasty scenario.

Basically I accept, but do not fully understand, peoples need for stories of
this nature. I hold myself and only myslef accountable for my mental and
emotional state. i wake up smiling almost every single morning, and go to bed
happy. I have been without money, sick and homeless and I did the same then,
perhaps with a bit of concern, but I was still happy. I attribute this to the
Atheistic outlook i have on life: I choose to live it happily - and fulfill my
biological purpose on this planet - live, reproduce, and die.

i would like to embed a meme in it, but frankly, i was joking more than
anything. You have all seen Richards anti-dote to phony virus spam at
http://www.brodietech.com/antidote.htm well, someone sent me this one, which is
the kind of humor I am talking about:

debrady@ix.netcom.com; rld@ix.netcom.com
Subject: Virus

> JOINTHECREW will re-write your hard drive. Not only that, but
> it will scramble any disks that are even close to your computer. It
> will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice
> cream goes melty. It will demagnetize the strips on all your credit
> cards, screw up the tracking on your television and use subspace field
> harmonics to scratch any CD's you try to play.
>
> It will give your ex-girlfriend your new phone number. It
> will mix Kool-aid into your fishtank. It will drink all your beer and
> leave its socks out on the coffee table when there's company coming
> over. It will put a dead kitten in the back pocket of your good suit
> pants and hide your car keys when you are late for work.
>
> JOINTHECREW will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will
> give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your
> gas tank and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your
> girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room to
> your Discover card.
>
> It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she
> is dead, such is the power of JOINTHECREW, it reaches out beyond the
> grave to sully those things we hold most dear.
>
> It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you can't
> find it. It will kick your dog. It will leave libidinous messages on
> your boss's voice mail in your voice! It is insidious and subtle. It
> is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather
> interesting shade of mauve.
>
> JOINTHECREW will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the
> toilet seat up. It will make a batch of Methanphedime in your bathtub
> and then leave bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to chase
> gradeschoolers with your new snowblower.
>
> Listen to me. JOINTHECREW does not exist.

Sodom
Bill Roh
oh BTW - Sorry about the dreams thing Eric, thats a shame.

Eric Boyd wrote:

> Hi,
>
> sodom <Sodom@ma.ultranet.com> wrote:
> > Actually, what I would like to do, is change the words around,
> > spend a bit of time discussing the sisters "pedophelia" streak,
> > and how she loved sex with young Mark. I would do everything
> > possble to put it in a kind and understanding light then distribute
> > it back to everyone!!!
>
> As a joke? As a joke with an imbedded meme? I realize this is hardly core
> virian, but could you explain?
>
> ERiC